*crickets*

A tumbleweed blows lazily across the front of the Bar and Grill.

*more crickets*

A lone doormouse scurries into a crack in the rotting floor.

*humming*

The inky black darkness is pierced by a searing beam of light.

*CRASH*

A bloated hunk of spacecraft slams into the bar, sending wood and metal flying.

*sssslither*

<snooort> <chortle> <slobber>

*maniacal laughter*